1. Every relationship is different. What works for some people, won’t work for others. Be careful about giving and accepting advice on interfaith marriage. Some advice will simply not be relevant to your situation. That being said, people who have done this already have wisdom to share. Learn from them, but trust your own path as well.

2. Don’t “water down” your faith in the process of working things out. Religious and cultural traditions run deeper than you sometimes think. You may eventually resent having given something up to quickly. Be who you are, and find a way to make that work rather than giving up things that are important.

3. Combining holidays isn’t necessarily a great solution to the holiday issue. Christmas and Hannukah are not about the same thing. Let each holiday have integrity.

4. Don’t ask your partner to worship or celebrate in ways that compromise their own identity.

5. If your partner belongs to a religious community, get to know and be friends with some of the people in that group. If a person’s religious community becomes totally separate from their partner, they can become divided when the going gets rough.

6. Family, Family, Family. Don’t just work hard at your relationship with your partner, work hard on your relationship with their family as well. Any efforts made in that department will benefit your relationship tenfold.

7. Continue to learn about your own tradition. Study it. Learn about the personalities of its history. You may even find important examples in your religion’s history of interfaith relationships! (How about Moses?)

Do you have some tips or a story you’d like to share? Email us at shebrew@shebrew.com!