I think I speak for most guys when I say…

It’s not that when I go out I’m looking for just a one night stand. And it’s not that I’m looking to bust out at 7:30 the next morn if we do bump uglies…It’s because my Grandmother died (for the fifth time) and I need to go. And by that I mean that I just got a new video game that I’m going to want to wake up and play first thing in the morning, before the Sox come on at 2:00. Well that might be an extreme example and the chances are that I had to fish through your wallet, while you were sleeping because I forgot your name, because I forget my own name after 11 Bud Lights. Point is…well I forget that too, but that BS story I fed you last night sounded good enough didn’t it?….Oops…I’m just going to start over again if that’s okay. (Damn, I need to remember to not type everything I think.)

It’s not that when I go out I’m looking for just a one night stand because trust me, I’ll tell my friends about what we did for the next week, so it’ll be like we’ve known each other awhile…(Wait. That’s probably not going to make me look so good with the female readers right now. It’s not really my even style, so I guess I won’t try and impress my bros.)

Okay I got it…

It’s not that when I go out I’m looking for just a one night stand. I’m at the point in my life where I really want to meet someone who I can connect with on many different levels, but she* isn’t always there or the timing isn’t right or whatever, so sometimes I may meet someone else who clicks on that one level. Like I said, I may not be looking for it, but if at the end of the night/early morning I’m wearing your underwear on my head, so be it. We can have fun for a night, can’t we? Even if nothing comes of it? I’m actually one of those chaps who really doesn’t get interested in someone before I’ve known them for awhile. But, I can forgo this requisite after some Buds if the two of us are both going to enjoy ourselves for the next five hours and 32 minutes. I’m sure there are plenty of women out there who may phrase it slightly differently (unless you are trying to get rid of me so you can play your own video games. In which case, I want to stay because now I’m in love with you), but I’m sure a lot of them feel this way a lot of the time. I don’t think it’s a bad thing on anyone’s part. It not so unnatural that it should be frowned upon, but the practice is definitely skewed towards that direction.

Hey, maybe it works out though. Problem is that usually if we cave in to our urges for a night, things are going to be dicey come sun up and that’s a scientific fact. We just met. The only thing we have in common other than that we both had poodles growing up is that we were both looking to fulfill basic needs for a night. Does that make enough sense? Not the dogs growing up part, the attraction for a night part. Anyway, sometimes it’s just good to risk it and get these things out of your system while you’re single and free. I wish things would be cool and I wish everyone I met meant the world to me, but that’s just not going to happen…maybe it does in parts Utah as HBO has taught me, but I’m in Boston.

So what I think I’m trying to say is that one night stands are going to happen. Who knows how they are going to work out? I guess seeing each other again depends on a number of factors like how the night went, how well we connected, whether or not I was willing to leave with only one shoe because I couldn’t find the other one anywhere. – (Boy, this is tough. I need an ending to this article. How am I going to get out of this? A slice of pizza would really hit the spot right now too. I wish I was McGyver, he’d know what to do.) Hopefully we are able to respect each other enough to handle the next morning responsibly. Be fair with one another and see if anything is to come of what happened on our One Night Stand.

*girl of my dreams